I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
