HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
