There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize
