Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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