weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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