you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
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