she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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