i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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