There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
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