Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
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