There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize
