she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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