is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
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Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
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I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
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