You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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