I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
