He disabled his match.com account in front of me
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Randomize