id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
I think people are normalizing furries
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
