haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
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Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
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Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.