It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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