So drunk its hurt
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
