His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
