We're like a lot better than the average bears
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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