I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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