Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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