There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize