i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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