New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I look excited, but its just a facade.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
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