I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
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It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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