no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
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