Plan B is the new Plan A
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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