Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(707): View more from California

I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits

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(707): I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits http://tfl.nu/21ol

Replies (24) Good night (1828) Bad night (1011)
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(949): View more from California

Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.

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(949): Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever. http://tfl.nu/rea8

Replies (358) Good night (24400) Bad night (7510)
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(612): View more from Minnesota

Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out

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(612): Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out http://tfl.nu/cyb8

Replies (45) Good night (5510) Bad night (979)
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(317): View more from Indiana

The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic

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(317): The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic http://tfl.nu/lvdi

Replies (17) Good night (15887) Bad night (1207)
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(804): View more from Virginia

he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms

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(804): he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms http://tfl.nu/3xwg

Replies (2) Good night (3467) Bad night (864)
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(360): View more from Washington

tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse

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(360): tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse http://tfl.nu/pqsg

Replies (7) Good night (2667) Bad night (976)
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(816): View more from Missouri

It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.

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(816): It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain. http://tfl.nu/o28o

Replies (1) Good night (1259) Bad night (516)
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(706): View more from Georgia

I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything

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(706): I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything http://tfl.nu/u65o

Replies (11) Good night (1318) Bad night (651)
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(413): View more from Massachusetts

I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.

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(413): I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened. http://tfl.nu/qzdq

Replies (10) Good night (2561) Bad night (978)
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(317): View more from Indiana

Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.

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(317): Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home. http://tfl.nu/w49b

Replies (2) Good night (1331) Bad night (683)
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(803): View more from South Carolina

I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.

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(803): I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night. http://tfl.nu/gwrd

Replies (5) Good night (558) Bad night (1695)
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(314): View more from Missouri

How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.

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(314): How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death. http://tfl.nu/x5xg

Replies (4) Good night (967) Bad night (293)
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(515): View more from Iowa

I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.

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(515): I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head. http://tfl.nu/kz5k

Replies (10) Good night (1185) Bad night (301)
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(914): View more from New York

I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.

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(914): I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive. http://tfl.nu/7nw5

Replies (5) Good night (938) Bad night (325)
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(904): View more from Florida

At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.

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(904): At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed. http://tfl.nu/y86x

Replies (5) Good night (276) Bad night (589)

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