Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (484): I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control http://tfl.nu/pmnn
  Replies (19) Good night (669) Bad night (2377)
• Favorite

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (701): The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night. http://tfl.nu/22ub
  Replies (12) Good night (855) Bad night (3672)
• Favorite

  (864): View more from South Carolina

  Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (864): Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself http://tfl.nu/j8cd
  Replies (66) Good night (6836) Bad night (1234)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  sarcasm needs its own font

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (440): sarcasm needs its own font http://tfl.nu/5kc7
  Replies (55) Good night (8412) Bad night (846)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (860): Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life. http://tfl.nu/zt1o
  Replies (21) Good night (2344) Bad night (4816)
• Favorite

  (+49): View more from Germany

  The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+49): The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed? http://tfl.nu/pvwt
  Replies (8) Good night (3926) Bad night (1322)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (317): I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once. http://tfl.nu/p9x8
  Replies (0) Good night (1919) Bad night (1011)
• Favorite

  (239): View more from Florida

  so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (239): so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are. http://tfl.nu/bpgx
  Replies (15) Good night (3359) Bad night (1080)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls http://tfl.nu/crru
  Replies (8) Good night (2258) Bad night (1168)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (206): She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers. http://tfl.nu/uzdb
  Replies (3) Good night (2404) Bad night (750)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (518): Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play http://tfl.nu/j01d
  Replies (10) Good night (1619) Bad night (664)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  Wanna skype?

  (1-425): View more from Washington

  Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): Wanna skype? (1-425): Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no. http://tfl.nu/gc87
  Replies (7) Good night (2395) Bad night (872)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  You need a twittervention. You're better than this.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (978): You need a twittervention. You're better than this. http://tfl.nu/6sfs
  Replies (7) Good night (746) Bad night (560)
• Favorite

  (501): View more from Arkansas

  I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (501): I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something. http://tfl.nu/os86
  Replies (0) Good night (507) Bad night (255)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (304): Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint. http://tfl.nu/67cs
  Replies (2) Good night (710) Bad night (277)

Randomize