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• (830): View more from Texas

  I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.

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• (713): View more from Texas

  You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin

  (954): View more from Florida

  Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.

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  If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things

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• (516): View more from New York

  i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.

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• (443): View more from Maryland

  We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy

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• (281): View more from Texas

  Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning

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• (704): View more from North Carolina

  I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.

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  23 Struggles Kids These Days Will Never Know

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• (785): View more from Kansas

  My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real

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• (510): View more from California

  Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.

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• (315): View more from New York

  First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on

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• (651): View more from Minnesota

  Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.

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• (904): View more from Florida

  I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.

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• (302): View more from Delaware

  If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.

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