i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
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Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
USA USA USA
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.