We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Randomize
