would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
