did you get engaged???
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Randomize
