She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
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