He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize