Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize