I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize