Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize