Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
