Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize