i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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