I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
