And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
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I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
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Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
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