how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
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We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
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I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
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