Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
