Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
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