Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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