I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
